Saturday, May 05, 2007

Confuzed

Well guys, I am confused yet again. Last night I went out to a local club with one of my exe's and a couple of old friends. It was a fun night and then it happened.. my ex kissed me. That wasn't bad.. I was surprised about it and I think so was she. It sparked feelings in me that I haven't felt for her in a long time. I am confused because I have a GF at the moment and I love her. But I also have these feelings for my ex as well.. damn... I don't know what I should do... ahh well.. time will tell soon enough.

Friday, April 13, 2007

Memories

Well I guess no one reads this anymore so I can post what ever the hell I want.

This isn't meant to be a vent blog and I hope it doesn't turn out that way. Anyway on to what I want to write about.

I want to write about an amazing girl, someone that has been there for me through some tough times and who I though cared enough for me not to do what she did. Well no negative. I was thinking tonight about that girl and how much she means to me... even after almost a year of not seeing her. Smart, caring, kind... well those are what I really want to remember. The times she spent at my house, the times that I spent at her house without her moms permission. Her grad party and many more things.

I can't believe what happened to us happened.. but I should have guessed it.. I fell head over heals for this woman and she tore my heart out. I still love her deeply but that will never change the fact that I fucked up and I am the one who has to pay the price for it. I hope someday we can come together and clear up any diffrences... not just for our sake but for someone else's.

Anyway that is my blogg and I am sticking to it.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Sweetie

I was thinking about you the other day.. what we might do. Perhaps we'll have lunch at some nice little cafe. Maybe we'll find one with a booth in the corner, or a table a little off to the side and out of the way.
If we're lucky we'll get one of those waiters that sort of disappears after they bring you your food. You may have a glass of wine or two and get a little brave. I've been thinking about some of the things we've talked about... and you make sure to remind me of them while we're sitting there.
You reach your hand over and slide it up your leg. Looking around us you see that no one is looking, so you slowly slide it higher and discover that my dry cleaner has shrunk my pants.
Oops, wrong... but I really need my help to be comfortable.
Too bad, the waiter pops back over to see if we need anything so you remove your hand and smile innocently at him while I order us another couple of wines.
We wait patiently while he brings them... knowing that once our glasses are refreshed he won't be back for a while.
In the meantime you lean over to me close enough so that your breast rubs up against my hand, which is resting on the table. I slide my fingers under your halter top and caress your nipple which needs little encouragement to become tight and erect. As the waiter heads over with our wine I pinch it slightly before I pull away.
After he is gone you lean over to kiss me... sliding your hand under the table at the same time and between my legs.
My pants are still way too tight and, wanting me to be comfortable, you look for a way to provide me with some relief.
You realize that the tablecloth will provide excellent cover if you just slide it down a little further toward us and, as you do that, you use your other hand to unzip you.
I am so hard. You move closer to me and slide your hand around my shaft... moving slowly up, then down. Teasing me with your fingers you circle the tip, teasing the top as a small drop of moisture appears in anticipation of what is to come.

You hear me moan as you slide your hand back down, gripping me more firmly as you whisper in my ear, telling me what you're going to be doing to me.
You continue sliding your hand up and down my shaft, not too much, trying to stay in control, as we are still in a public place.
I groan as you move a little faster, then slower.... then faster again.
You stop suddenly as the waiter comes back over and asks us if we're ready for our check.
You respond..
"He's ready I think."
I almost choke on my laughter. You smile when you see my hand shaking as I pick up my wine glass to finish the last few drops.
You leave me for a minute to go to the ladies room... you're going to need time to prepare before we leave the restaurant.
You picture me paying the check, then heading back toward where you went, wondering what is taking you so long.
You hear my footsteps and, as you hear them approaching the bathroom door, you reach out and drag me inside, locking it quickly behind me.
It's completely dark inside and I reach my hands out trying to feel my way around.
You hear my quick intake of breath as you guide my hand to your body so I can discover with my fingers what I can't see with my eyes. When I feel your wetness I realize you're ready for me, right there, right now.
Without any light or vision available, I use my hands to find my way, I turn you, bending you over the counter.
Using my foot to spread your legs apart, you hear my zipper as I release myself and plunge into you in one hard thrust, almost lifting you from your feet.
This is so exciting, me inside you, the sounds of the busy restaurant coming through the walls, and I begin to moan in pleasure as you slam into you over and over again.
Fearing that we'll be overheard, I put my hand over your mouth to quiet you, which really just excites you even more.
Here we are in the dark, i'm pounding away in you, you can't speak, and all of a sudden it occurs to you that you really didn't get a good look at me when you pulled me into the bathroom.
You mean, you assumed it was me coming down the hall. But, what if it wasn't?
What if I are still sitting out there at our table wondering what is taking you so long?
You begin to struggle, trying to get free of my hand, but I (is it me?) simply read this as a further sign of passion and grip you harder, plunging into you over and over again. You feel your orgasm building and you feel my legs tense as I, too, reach the end.
My hand slips from your mouth as I grab your hips with both hands... pulling you against me as I thrust deeper into you. You're mind is so fogged over now, you're so close to the edge that you're only focused now on the feeling of me as I pump myself into you, our orgasms exploding together... the feeling of me as I slow my motions, thrusting into you one more time and holding yourself there while I feel your breathing slow.
After a moment I slide out of you. You feel my kiss the back of you neck and hear me zip myself back up.
You don't have time to turn around in the cramped bathroom as you hear me snap the lock on the door, open it, and slip out.
You turn on the light, making any needed adjustments before you head out. You take a deep breath,open the door. you're hoping to see me standing just outside.
I'm not though, and your heart starts racing as as walk back toward our table.
"There you are," I say as I hand the check to the waiter and rise from the table. "What took you so long?"
You're really at a loss for words and I sense something is wrong.
"I, uh..."
"Come on, let's get out of here," I say.
I take your hand as I walk past and sort of drag you along. You're looking confused, looking around, looking at me, looking at the bathroom door.
The glaring sunlight hits us as we step out of the restaurant. You try to read the expression on my face... you mean, how do you pose the question you need to ask? ...Should you ask?
"You're all right aren't you?" I wink. "I mean, small dark places don't get you claustrophobic do they?"
............................."Hell no."

Thursday, June 29, 2006

One More Day With You.

Last night I had a crazy dream
A wish was granted just for me
It could be for anything
I didn't ask for money
Or a mansion in Malibu
I simply wished, for one more day with you
One more day
One more time
One more sunset, maybe I'd be satisfied
But then again
I know what it would do
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you
First thing I'd do, is pray for time to crawl
Then I'd unplug the telephone
And keep the TV offI'd hold you every second
Say a million I love you's
That's what I'd do, with one more day with you
One more day
One more time
One more sunset, maybe I'd be satisfied
But then againI know what it would do
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you
Leave me wishing still, for one more day
Leave me wishing still, for one more day


No explination needed.

Poetry

I know not alot of people come around my blogg no more cause i dont update it enough.. Well here is the update anyway.

This is about my poetry... Im not verry good but meh i cant do anythign about that. I just like to hear peopls comments on it and all that great and funn stuff. well the site is www.postpoems.com/members/brian and if you write i encourage you to post. My saying is the only horrible poem is an unpublished poem. My suggestion is to read I Will Tell You.. That is one of the best poems i wrote. not the best there is a better one then that but that one is good.

Well looking foreword to all your comments on my poetry.. i try to update it at least once every 2 weeks or sometimes sooner. All depends on how buisy i am to write.


Anyway avid readers. I am out for now

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

It Takes A Man by Aaron Lines

She locked her fingers and bowed her head
She said I'm late, and I'm really scared
You can go, but I hope you stay
I'm gonna keep it, either way

In my daddy's el camino
In her driveway in the rain
Staring through the windshield
I could see my future change
And my heart hit like a hammer
And my thoughts were running wild
Any fool can make a baby
It takes a man, to raise a child

I laid my head, down on the wheel
She said I know, I know, it don't seem real
She closed her eyes, tears flowed through
She said don't hate me, for loving you

In my daddy's el camino
In her driveway in the rain
Staring through the windshield
I could see my future change
And my heart hit like a hammer
And my thoughts were running wild
Any fool can make a baby
It takes a man, to raise a child

Well I could not reassure her
I couldn't say what I had planned
Couldn't put three words together
So I just, took her hand

In my daddy's el camino
In her driveway in the rain
Staring through the windshield
I could see my future change
And my heart hit like a hammer
And my thoughts were running wild
Any fool can make a baby
It takes a man, to raise a child
It takes a man

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

You know

you know that i never really understood what i had till it was gone
You know that it was right in front of me the whole time
I had the only thing that i wanted in this world.
I had her but she went away.

I love her to the day that i die
Through thick and thin till death do us part
ill love her till the day i die

To have my kid and to say good bye
to hurt me in such a way
the hardest things in the world
would to let you go......
but in the end its right

I love her to the day i die
Through thick and thin till death do us part
ill love her till the day i die

I see you once a week to my little blue eyes
Before, i seen you everyday
That little fresh smile and your lovely perfume
spread all around the place
but in the end its right

I love her to the day i die
through thick and thin till death do us part
ill love her till the day i die

The hardest thing i ever did
Was to let her out of my sight
to see her walk away
into the stary night
But in the end its right

I love her to the day i die
through thick and thin till death do us part
ill love her till the day i die


I love her to the day i die
I love her to the day i die
Through Thick and thin Till death do us part
Ill love her to the day i die........
ill love her to the day I die............................

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Creepy

I never thought I was strong enough
To handle raising my own son
You'll always fear what you've never done
I hope he'll know me when
I come home
Nothing gonna change
My love for you
I love my child
He's got his mother's smile
I'm so fortunate so fortunate
Life can get tightBut
I will make it right
I'm so fortunate so fortunate
I had to learn what meant more to me
My family's became everything
I miss you more than you'll ever know
I wish that
I could just leave come home



This is to creepy of a song to even write words to. It is everythign that i am feeling or am going throuhg in a small little song. Its powerfull in its own way.